Celebrities NOT allowed to shop at Manifold

So, while reading Gawker I saw this post about Caravan, an "exclusive member-only" boutique in New York -- including unlisted telephone numbers. This being NYC, member-only translates to "celebrity", even if you're of the D-list variety. I guess velvet ropes at the club door aren't enough anymore.

As a retail owner, my first thought is WTF?! I certainly understand trying to set yourself apart from the competition. I just don't understand why you would want to turn away potential business. As long as someone will pay, why not take the money?

Don't get me wrong. I'm not hating on Caravan. If anything, I'm jealous (and confused as hell) that this concept is working out for them. Caravan just opened its third location; I'm still worried about getting my rent paid next month for one location -- especially with only 28 days to earn revenue.

Since Chicago is home to quite a few celebrities and those who visit/film here, Manifold is implementing its own concept: the anti-exclusive store. If you're a "celebrity" you can only shop at Manifold if you're with a non-celebrity; personal assistants don't count. The following people, however, can NEVER shop at Manifold, accompanied by non-celebrities or not (in no particular order, except PH -- who should be banned from life. Yes, from life . . . at least mine!):

1. Paris Hilton: racist, skank (which is usually a good thing, but not with her), annoyance
2. Brandon Davis: douche, though when applied to him that term demeans all other douches
3. Clay Aiken: delusional or a liar, not sure which
4. Lindsey Lohan: low-rent diva wanna-be
5. Britney Spears: trailer park princess (again, usually a good thing but . . .)
6. Nicole Richie: guilt by association (see PH), for starters
7. Jessica and Ashlee Simpson: gladly epitomize the blonde stereotype
8. Olsen Twins: fail to realize that rexi isn't chic
9. Donald Trump: grandiose . . . in his own mind
10. Michael Jackson: waaayyy too many reasons to list
11. Gwyneth Paltrow: the New England (and fake British) Blanche Dubois
12. Nicky Hilton: misfortune of being the sister of Paris
13. The Wayans Family: actually think they're funny
13 1/2. Ann Curry: just because

This list is subject to frequent updates as other "celebrities" piss me off and make me rethink the purpose of mankind. But short of curing a disease, I can guarantee you that none of these people will fall off the banned list.